Have you ever stayed up late to watch the late night TV babe shows?  I know most straight men will have done this at least once or twice in the past.  You know the ones I mean of course?  The ones in the 900s on Sky television (not quite sure what numbers they are in the Freeview).

 

Anyway, I was watching them the other night, as I often do, and I thought that I really should tell you lot about if you haven't heard of them.  This is an excellent way to wank off for free (or jerk off for all you Americans out there!)

 

They actually offer you the opportunity to talk to the girls on the telephone and tell them what you would like them to do etc.  So for example you might like one of the babes (and they are babes believe me!) to bend over and spread her legs for you and pretend that you are actually fucking her.  That all sounds perfectly reasonable doesn't it?  Yes?  Well I have to say that I have never actually called one of them for a very simple reason.  I don't need to.

 

You see all I do is rely on someone else phoning up to ask them to bend over or shake their tits.  Why do I need to spend £1.50 a minute (or whatever it is) in order to ask a babe to do something she's going to do anyway?  So all I do is pretend that it's me that has asked them to simulate sucking cock or whatever they are doing; this works out much cheaper.  Besides I pay my Sky subscription, and I want something for my money don't I?

 

I have the choice of all the girls and the expense of none of them!  So I'm here to tell you lot who phone these girls to carry on doing it please, and to all you lot who have never tried them out, go and do it!

 

You can check some of them out on this website, which will lead you directly to their live shows! (also for free if you don't want to pay!)